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Yellow yellow, dirty fellow.@Monday, August 17, 2009,5:33 PM Yellow, you dirty fellow! I hate you! I really do. The reflection form was given to me today. Straight in my face! And my badge was taken, just like that! I admit I was in the wrong but sometimes, everything I do seemed wrong to you. Eventhough you always tell me that you're not against me, why others or rather most notices it too? While I was reflecting upon my behaviour.. The first line I wrote was "As a classchairperson, I wasn't being a good role model to the rest of my classmates." And I started crying. I was asking myself "What had happened to me? Why why why?" But no answers found. Everywhere I looked, was my teachers from different subjects. I felt that I've really disappoint them. My form teacher and my co-form teacher. My parents! But most of all, I've disappointed this teacher badly. I was thinking of her. And then suddenly, she came out of staffroom and when I saw her, someone whom recommended me to be the chairperson of my class, I cried even more. I didn't know how to face her then. I saw her and immediately lied on my hands and cried. As written in the reflection form, I need to: Learn to respect a teacher, Learn to stop rolling my eyes, Learn to be humble, Learn to be a good role model, Learn to stop talking loudly, Learn to handle myself in situations well, Learn to stand still, Learn to talk properly without being misunderstood as argue, Learn to behave, Learn to ...... Etc. That teacher said that I wrote well but she didn't believed it. Yes of course, I agree. Actions speaks louder than words. I do want to prove to that teacher that I can be what I wrote! It takes two hands to clap, yes? You guys may ask, why did I do all those things? A simple answer, I was misunderstood and was told to shut up by that teacher while I was trying to clear myself and my friend. Ugh! And then later on, I was asked "How badly do you want to be a classchairperson?" by that teacher. The first time she asked, I was dumbfounded and speechless. I really didn't know what to say. I thought through and all but still, nothing. So, she moved on to another question, which was .... And she came back to that question. And she stopped talking about it and move on. So I'm done with reflecting upon my attitude and behaviour. For now, I wanna reflect upon "How badly do I want to be a classchairperson?" I can say "Very badly". But will that teacher even believe me? And also, what kind of a classchairperson has a freaking yellow form with 3 demerits? Life is really unfair, when you're being misunderstood and when you don't know how to handle yourself well in situations. Please don't ask me where my badge is tomorrow or whenever. It's gone, period. [Editted @ 9.22pm] Nobody's perfect huh, Evan? And yeah, everybody has those days. :) |